
Back in 2019, I hit rock bottom. I was completely lost—disconnected from who I was. I didn’t know who Lital was outside of being a wife and a mom, and to be honest, I wasn’t finding much joy in life...
On top of that, I was overweight and unhealthy, and I convinced myself that fixing my physical health would fix everything else. So, I jumped into a health journey and, over the course of 18 months, I lost 50 pounds. Physically, I was in the best shape I’d been in for years—but mentally and emotionally, I was still struggling. I didn’t feel any better.
Just as I started trying to dig deeper to figure out what was really going on inside, COVID hit. Overnight, the little bit of breathing room I had was gone. Now there were no quiet moments to think, process, or just be. Instead, there was the anxiety and fear of trying to keep my family safe, homeschooling my kids, and wearing so many hats that I didn’t even know who I was anymore.
One day, in early April 2020, I completely broke down. It was one of those typical pandemic days—Zoom meetings for the kids' school, figuring out packets of homework, entertaining my toddler, trying to keep the noise down so my husband could work in his makeshift office in our guest room. By the end of the day, I collapsed and started crying uncontrollably. I felt like a failure—not just as a mom but as a person. I looked at my husband and said, “If this keeps going, I’m going to break. We’re all going to break.”
That was the moment I knew something had to change. I couldn’t do it alone, and I needed space to breathe, to think, and to figure out what I needed for myself. My husband was incredibly supportive. Together, we came up with a routine that gave me uninterrupted time for myself. It started with a couple of hours in the morning for workouts and reading, and it grew into a few hours on weekends for taking online classes or webinars. Eventually, I realized I needed to get back into the workforce in some capacity—doing something I loved.
That’s when I rediscovered my passion for writing and fashion. In 2021, I took an image consulting and styling course, became a brand partner with Savvi, and launched The Fashion Mission. I started offering personal styling services and writing weekly blog posts about fashion in motherhood. But as much as I loved that work, something else started tugging at me.
The Turning Point: Discovering My True Passion
As I reached out to moms, building my team in Savvi, I started hearing their stories. And the more I listened, the more I realized their stories were eerily similar to mine. Up until that point, I thought my struggles—the identity crisis I was going through—were unique to me. But these moms, from different places and backgrounds, were all facing the same things. They were lost, coping alone, and afraid to reach out because they didn’t want to be judged.

That’s when it hit me—my real calling wasn’t just fashion. My passion was helping moms rediscover themselves and bring awareness to the identity struggles so many of us go through. I realized that I wanted to create a space specifically for moms in the personal development world—a space that understood the realities and struggles we face every day.
Why Pausing Is So Important
One of the hardest lessons I learned through this journey was the importance of pausing. As moms, we’re always in motion—always doing for others, always juggling a million things. Getting quiet with ourselves feels impossible. But that pause, that quiet time, is where the magic happens.
I started setting aside time—literally blocking off time in my schedule—just to sit and be still. For me, it was early mornings, before the house woke up, with my lemon water and my thoughts. It wasn’t always easy, but that’s when the clarity started coming. I finally had space to think again, to see what wasn’t working in my life, and to figure out what I wanted to create more of. That pause gave me the clarity to design the life I wanted.

It also made me realize something important: I had been blaming everyone else for my unhappiness. The truth was, I had made choices that led me to where I was, and I had the power to make new choices that would lead me somewhere better. That moment of clarity changed everything.
Letting Go of Expectations
Letting go of outside expectations was a game-changer for me. The only voices that truly mattered were mine, my husband’s, and my kids’. Everyone else’s opinions? Noise. It didn’t matter if it was caring noise, judgmental noise, or even helpful noise—I had to tune it out.
I started setting boundaries—not just with how I spent my time, but also with who I spent it with. I became intentional about who was in my inner circle and focused on creating time with those people. And I said no to anything that didn’t serve me or my family.
Reconnecting with My Passions
I knew I needed to reconnect with the things that made me feel like me—fashion, traveling, writing, dancing, music, running, gardening. I had to prioritize these things, even in the chaos of motherhood. I started small—just 15 minutes a day—and built it up. Now, my passions have a place in my schedule, whether it’s daily, weekly, monthly, or yearly. They keep me connected to myself outside of the roles I play as a mom and wife.

The Tools That Helped Me Focus
Journaling has always been my way of processing things, so it became a non-negotiable part of my routine. Sitting quietly in the mornings, even for just a few minutes, helps me connect with myself. And while I enjoy traditional forms of meditation, I’ve found that my favorite form of meditation is gardening. It’s the quiet, peaceful time I need to process everything.

I also started taking quiet walks—no podcasts, no music—just me and the sounds of nature. It’s amazing how much clarity you can gain when you’re not distracted by outside noise. For me, nature has a way of calming my mind and helping me find focus.
Figuring Out What Really Matters
Once I got clear on what I wanted more of in my life—and what I wanted less of—it became easier to make decisions. One of my favorite mentors, Darren Hardy, says, “If it’s not a hell yes, it’s a no.” That advice has been a game-changer for me.
These days, I rarely say, “Let me think about it.” I either know something is right for me, or I know it’s not. Two questions I always ask myself are: Why does this matter to me? and Am I doing this because I truly want it or because it’s expected of me? When I feel that gut excitement—that “hell yes”—I know it’s aligned with who I am.
Saying No to Make Space for What Matters
Learning to say no has been one of the most powerful things I’ve done. It’s given me the freedom to focus on what really matters—my family, my passions, and the things that bring me joy. It’s not always easy, but it’s always worth it.
Clarity Is an Ongoing Journey
Finding clarity isn’t something you do once, and then you’re done. It’s an ongoing journey, and I regularly check in with myself to make sure my goals and dreams still align with where I am. Life changes, and so do we. Staying connected to myself has been a constant process, but it’s brought me so much peace and purpose.

Are you ready to find your own clarity?
Please join us for our Awaken event on October 30th where we’ll explore how to set personal goals that align with who you are now. Email us at info@destination-thrive.com for a special introductory code that offers first-timers a one-time price of $100. Let’s reflect, redefine, and thrive together!
Embracing the Journey
Reclaiming our identity beyond motherhood doesn't mean diminishing the value of our role as mothers. Instead, it signifies a commitment to becoming more whole, content, and engaged individuals, capable of embracing the challenges of motherhood with renewed vigor and perspective.
This expedition is not just about self-discovery; it's about modeling a life of balance, fulfillment, and resilience for our children. By nurturing our own identities, we teach our children the importance of self-care, personal growth, and the pursuit of individual passions.
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